Some days are just cranky days, and today is one of mine. I am tired, exhausted, and didn't sleep well. I had several nightmares last night, and those never help me feel all that great. So, all day I have been fighting to balance feeling cranky with needing to be a good mom and wife.
Some days I just wish I could sleep until I woke up feeling rested. Before I got sick, I didn't really think about what a luxury it is to feel rested. I have always been someone who woke up ready to start running, and so feeling exhausted when I wake up has been even more dragging than it would otherwise. I keep hoping that I will get the energetic me back. In the meantime, I am trying to do as much as I can to stay healthy, keep my kids and husband happy, and do the things that we need to do.
So, I have a decision to make. The kids and I have been planning a baking day for weeks. It is set for tomorrow. Several other families are invited, moms are coming with the kids, and all the ingredients have been purchased. So, do I let my exhaustion cancel the day, and still have to figure out some way to keep my kids happy, or do I let the plans stand and risk being even more exhausted tomorrow?
Complicating the decision is how much the kids want to make the cookies, how much I enjoy adult conversation (which I don't get that often with having been sick) and how important I think it is to make holiday memories with my kids. I also think it is important for them to get to see friends they don't go to school with.
So, I will keep thinking and praying about it, but I will probably go ahead with the baking day, and hope that we all sleep well tonight. But boy, it is a struggle not to be cranky with everyone......
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